Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
