Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
You don't make any sense
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