Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
