So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
my shit smells like andre
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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