There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
