i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
