I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
