Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
He did a backflip because drugs
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
