If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
