I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
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