Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
