im gay
i know
yea but for you.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
