Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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