So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
