After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
