I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Randomize
