So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
