You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
