cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Randomize
