I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
