Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
