I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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