Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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