Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
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