Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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