Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
ttyl tear gas
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Randomize
