I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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