I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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