I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Randomize
