We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
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