i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
