But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Randomize
