So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
