Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
