I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Randomize
