the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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