but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
