i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Found your dick twin last night
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize
