I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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