I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
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