I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize
