i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
