It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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