worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Come share oat with me in your robe
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
