how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
