you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
You need a sexual gate keeper
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
