heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
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