Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
