you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
