It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
